And She's Sleeping Inside Of You

If someone had told me that one day I would see Debbie Gibson performing the song, "Lost In Your Eyes" live I wouldn't believe it, but that person would have been right. Last night I was sitting at my computer when I remembered that Rilo Kiley was back home for a night. I went to check what day exactly, hoping that I hadn't missed it, and found that they were at the Wiltern tonight (Sunday). So I decided to go. The show was great, including the supporting acts. The Kiley's set was excellent, much longer than the Coachella set. One highlight was Blake and Jenny singing cheek to cheek the song "So Long" which lyrics were the focus of one of my past entries. Anyway, during the encore and after they had played a song of their own, Jenny tells us that they are bringing out their friend, Deborah, so that they could play her song. So Debbie Gibson comes out, looking hot by the way, and sits at Jenny's keyboards and starts playing her popular song, with Rilo Kiley as her backing band. It was fun to see how excited the Kiley was about it, especially Blake who kept screaming away from the mic, "Deborah!!!" During the song and between verses, Debbie says, "I know. This is random for me too." Anyway, she sung the crap out of that song.

A few conclusions from my day in LA:

Southern California is in my blood. It's who I am, and I'd like to get to LA eventually.

Every once in a while people are nice to you when you are nice to them.

Rilo Kiley shred!!!

Canvas The Town And Brush The Backdrop

I still don't know exactly what it is about the labels 'boyfriend' and 'girlfriend' that bug me, but I figure I might as well type out some thoughts. I don't even like using those labels when it's not me or the person I'm in a relationship with. The weird thing is I don't mind saying 'fiance or husband/wife'. Like "Hey how's your wife doing?" That's fine, but I am uncomfortable saying, "So that's your boyfriend" I think it might have something to do with that whole stage of a relationship being the most fragile and vulnerable stage. I mean once you are engaged that's a big leap of commitment. It deserves to have labels, but in the (I don't even want to type it out) boyfriend/girlfriend stage so much can happen to sway the relationship in any direction. What I'd prefer to say over "I have a girlfriend" is "I'm in a relationship". I don't know. Those labels just kind of seem pointless to me sometimes, and they also seem like they are used to kind of emphasize the fact that they have someone. Like I said I don't quite completely get why I dislike those words so much, but I do.

Culminated Ruins Domino

So I've come to the conclusion that I like being miserable. Why is this? Obviously it's the only way I really feel alive. Otherwise I'm just a shell of a human being numb to everything. Misery gives you feeling. For years of my life I went without feeling, mostly as a way to protect myself from all the crap that was going on, but now I like to feel, to have emotions even if it's bad. On that note, here's lyrics to a song I wrote, or am writing that I think are some of the best I've written in a very long time, although who knows?:

In The Past Anyway

Fights, excuses, lies and lust
and I am still swimming in you
I believed you when you smiled
A precious sense of anything
and I’m everything below

Names, people and their lies
We are still a mystery
You and the memories just clash
But you told me more than I could take in
without wanting more

I break down on myself
I wish I had you to blame
but the ease of life hasn’t shown itself
and we worked better apart

In the past anyway
I had no right chasing a dream
Fights, excuses, lies and everything
I just want to know when you’re coming back